Somebody is always watching and No Bake Cookies

This blog is just for fun because sometimes life should include a lighter side. It is humbly dedicated to a smile from the past. John, you never knew who was watching and may never know the lives you changed just by you being part of their day. I am so glad you were part of mine.





No Bake Cookies

Step 1: Mix together
2 cups sugar (substitute products will not work)
1/4 cup cocoa
1/2 cup milk
1/4 1b (1 stick) butter (margarine will work but butter is creamier)

Cook in saucepan on medium heat stirring constantly until it starts to boil. Remove from the heat and let cool one minute. (No cheating... wait for one minute)


Step 2: add
1 tsp. vanilla flavoring
a pinch of salt
1/2 cup creamy peanut butter
3 cups uncooked oatmeal (can be regular or quick but regular adsorbs better)

Stir this all up (tasting is okay), drop by spoonfuls onto wax paper and let cool.
Serve... make lots. They go fast at any party!

Somebody is always watching

If you look at my graph you will see people don't always project their true feelings. It may take a while, but eventually guys learn when they are told "everything is FINE", there is a good chance that they will be hearing later on a subject that is not "fine" at all. Why it can take ten, twenty or even more years for us to acknowledge the people who helped us through years that were not "fine" is beyond me. That has been happening over the past few months in my world. People who I thought did not even know who I WAS are in communication with me and remembering things I never thought was obvious. For that reason, I am taking a moment to acknowledge someone who was a spice in my kitchen. As any cook knows, it does not take a lot of one spice to make a world of difference in a dish. This was and is John.

John and I went to school together back before there were cell phones, IPods and there was still prayer in school and before each football game. It was "cool" to go to a pep rally or bonfire and the police did not have to be present to monitor if drugs were being sold. Yes, there were paved roads and a small percentage of the students had cars but any other semblance to today pretty much is gone. We were the ones who sat on the back row. It was not that we were shy, it was just that alphabetically we were near the end of the alphabet... well at least for him. I was shy but hey that was a long, long time ago. People turned around and looked at the back of the class because John had kind of magnetism that made everybody want to see what he would say or do next. He was not the "class clown". He was just a good guy that had a smile for everybody. For those of us watching, it was neat. That is something people forget. Somebody is always watching you and your actions or interaction with others may be all that they need to make it through a difficult time. John loved hats and he says he still does. With his hat and the smile he always wore, he would be in the principals office the first day if he were a high school student today. You are not supposed to be different and anybody who smiles that much should probably be tested for drugs! How sad it that? The very things that set us apart and give us individuality are looked down on. People are watching now but for different reasons. Not to capture a moment of the magic but to judge.

I am looking through my spices today to make sure I have everything I need for the weekend. This weekend has been set aside as the winter session of "Camp-Nana's-Got-You". Many (sadly not all) of my grandchildren will be here! We will make decorations and Christmas cookies and watch Christmas movies in sleeping bags with teddy bears and popcorn. Come Sunday, the parents will come to get them and you may have to bag up what is left of me to toss in a chair to rest but it will be worth it. None of my spices will have the name "John" on it but I can assure you, he will not be far from my thoughts. I recently learned that his battle with cancer has cost him his leg and downtime from the teaching he loves but I have been told, he plans to return to work as soon as his treatments will allow it. I picture his smiling face and him tipping his hat oblivious to the ones who are watching and are inspired. Welcome to my kitchen, John. You will be in my prayers. Thank you for the spice you brought to my life.

Psalm 25:1 To you, oh Lord, I lift up my soul. Oh my God... I trust in you.

Love,
Nana

Thanksgiving pies and finding the real you

This blog is dedicated to Sarah Foran who lived and loved life with all her heart and to all my children and grandchildren. I hope they all know how very much they are loved.




I usually start with a receipe then add a story. Today will be a combination and I warn you it is a little long but it has to be that way.

Today is Thanksgiving and I cheated. I bought pumpkin pie filling instead of making mine from scratch. If you have read my previous blogs, you know that I am recovering from heart surgery a few months ago. What you DON'T know is my husband was involved in an accident a few weeks ago and is now in a wheelchair. The craziness that surrounds our holidays is not so much this year but the celebration is still important, so I am using canned pumpkin and we are doing our shopping online. I would like to say the shopping will be in front of a nice fire in the fireplace but it is in the 70's so it will probably be at the kitchen table.

For those of you who have never made your pumpkin from scrach, here is how you do it and keep reading to find out why I am showing a squash instead of a pumpkin in my picture. It is Sarah's secret which I finally get to share with you all!

How to go from Jack-O-Lantern to a pie:

1. Scrape the seeds and attached strings out of your split pumpkin. Top to bottom instead of straight around the middle. (I have my reasons for top to bottom and you will see that in a bit). Don't throw those seeds away! You can roast them for a healthy treat and I will share that with you in a bit too. Be patient! You are in Nana's kitchen and this is a place to relax.

2. Heat the oven to 400ºF. Place the two halves cut side down in a baking dish and roast for about an hour or until very soft inside. Remove from the oven and let cool.

3. Scrape up all the flesh inside the pumpkin, leaving only an empty shell or rind behind. If there is a lot of thick flesh that is too hard to be scraped up, then the pumpkin needs to roast a little longer. Put back in for five minutes at a time.

4. Put all that scraped up pumpkin in a food processor or use a potato masher and puree (or mash) until smooth. Refrigerate immediately; this will last for a few days in the fridge or a couple months in the freezer, well-sealed. When you take it out to use it you will probably notice some water separation. Make sure to drain this water away before using it in a recipe.

The picture you see is of a Cushaw squash. It was Sarah's favorite squash to use in making a holiday pie. She still made pumpkin pie but this was her favorite and mine.It works perfectly fine when you have roasted pumpkin too but this is what I promise to fix for Christmas this year.

Cushaw Squash Pie

Preheat oven to 375 degrees

2 cups prepared squash puree
(the green striped gourd that grows in teardrop shape)
2/3 cup brown sugar
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon ginger
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1/4 teaspoon cloves
3 eggs
1 teaspoonful vanilla flavoring
12 oz cream/evaporated milk

pastry for a single pie crust

Combine cushaw puree, brown sugar, cinnamon, ginger, salt, nutmeg and cloves in a bowl. Add eggs and vanilla and beat lightly to mix well. Stir in the milk slowly until smooth. Pour into the pie shell and bake on the bottom rack of the oven for 50-60 minutes. A toothpick, broom straw or knife will come out clean when it is done. Cool before serving. Great chilled or at room temperature.

Roasting the seeds:place seeds without strings (no need to wash them) on a greased cookie sheet. Sprinkle salt and roast at 375 until golden brown. You can bake them on the top rack while the pie bakes on the bottom!

Finding the real you

I read a story once about how we are like jack-o-lanterns. God picks us just as we are, He puts His hands on us and chooses us then He scoops out all the junk (seeds and strings) and puts a light in us for all to see. The problem I have with that is a jack-o-lantern does not last very long... perhaps a few days or even only a few hours. God did not mean for our light to only last a short time. Inside you is an amazing light and if you choose to hide it, you will be like a pumpkin still left on the vine. You will dry up and never really know what is it like to be part of a celebration. When God picks you, don't just let your light shine for a few days. Give love a lifetime to grow. No candles or batteries are needed. Just a willingness to love and forgive as we are loved and forgiven.

Isaiah 60:1 Arise, shine, for thy light is come and the glory of the Lord is risen upon you.

That is so much better than a jack-o-lantern! You are the real thing.

Love,
Nana

Planting seeds and raising kids

This is dedicated to all my children, grandchildren and my first great-grandson, Ashtyn. Hopefully the messages I leave you are a clear as this photo.






Lyrics: It was 19 Somethin'
Written by Chris Dubois and David Lee as performed by Mark Willis

"It was 1980 somethin'
In the world that I grew up in
Skating rinks and black Trans AMs
Big hair and parachute pants
Lookin back now I can see me
And oh man did I look cheesy
I wouldn't trade those day for nothin'
It was 1980 somethin."

Yesterday, I was going through my "important papers" box to find some documents Susan needed for enrollment in school. She needed her birth certificate, adoption papers and proof of her American citizenship because this is a Law Enforcement school and she will need a background check (it is a little difficult wrapping my mind around the fact that my youngest is now old enough to do these things). While I was putting together the documents she needed, I came across a large envelope marked "mom's treasures". I had to take a few moments to look at the letters my children wrote, the drawings they did and for a few moments, I was back in time just like the words to this song. There were a few photographs and, like the song said, there was some "cheese" involved. It made me take a long, hard look at myself as some memories of being a mom came into my mind. Some things, I might have done differently and some things I would do the same even though it might not be in agreement with my children then or now.

When our children are growing up they need balance in their life. Not just the right diet and trying to control the kind of movies or television shows they watch; they need the planting of seeds that will stay in their heart when nothing else in their world makes sense. My children were required to go to church with me until they graduated high school and they had to sit with me. After they graduated, it was their choice. Some continued with joy, some did not but the seeds were planted. Without exception, they found this to be unfair and old-fashioned but they did not get into trouble with the ones sitting on the back row for disrupting the church and sometimes they actually sang with the congregation. They might not have gotten a thing from the talk but I know sometimes a little slipped into their heart because it showed up later in their lives.

They need sports, dance, music and fun with friends. With all these things they need their parents to go with them instead of dropping them off. Yes, I was one of those embarrassing parents who actually went to baseball or soccer practice and some of my greatest evenings were sitting in the audience while my granddaughters danced not even knowing if I was there. I wrote letters that made them angry and the lectures of why "right is right and wrong is wrong" were also resented by all but every single one got them. They also got the last minute pants hemmed, the homework dropped off at school and the shoulder that sometimes could not make the hurt go away.

I was (and am) the meanest mom in the world. I think children should clean their own rooms after they are five, the household chores should be shared without payment and saying "yes sir" and "no sir" has a place in our society. When my children were small the laundry had to be folded before they went to play and when mom said to do something to ask "why?" was not even considered. When my children were small, they stood in a corner (they call it time out now except it usually is less severe than standing in a corner). I did not raise a single child that did not feel the sting of my hand on their bottom when their hearing was failing them. In this box, I found reminders of the days I had my children pull weeds in the back yard or they were given "community service" hours for not following some 'silly rule' I had. I should probably explain the "community service". I used that from 2000 to about 2003. My youngest were too old to spank and too young to be sent to the military so we got up early in the morning (only the ones in trouble) and we walked the perimeter of our neighborhood picking up trash. It was for an hour at a time and we did it for as many hours as they were "sentenced"... together. I never sent them alone and I worked as hard as they did. It was important for them to know their mom would never leave their side and there are consequences for their decisions. Afterward, we got home just as everyone was waking up and we had breakfast together. Moving forward was an important part of the balance. We had prayer at dinner together and "no" was a frequent answer to the things that "everybody else" was doing.

I have been a mom since I was nineteen and I am 'way old' now... at least I feel that way some days. I am not perfect by any means and there have been many lonely nights when I prayed and asked God to fill in the spots that I missed of their hearts. I asked for His forgiveness if I did anything that was wrong or not pleasing to Him because in the end, it will be Him that I answer to. I take that very seriously. Hearts and memories should be filled with the seeds of love and hope as part of this balancing act and I know the weeds of deception, doubt and fear are plentiful in this life. I can't protect my family from those seeds. There are far to many places in life that they exist but recently I have had the privilege of hearing the giggles of my grandchildren, read the writings of how proud my granddaughter is to be a mom and saw the excitement in my daughters eyes as she prepares to go into the world and make her mark. I have never seen a more beautiful garden and like the song says "I wouldn't trade those days for nothin'"

Hebrews 12:1 Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin that so easily ensnares us and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us.

Love,

Nana

Still in my PJs and Slimmed Down Spinach Quiche

For my friend Julie who is in the middle like she often is. She loves and gives and has no idea of the lives she touches.

SLIMMED DOWN SPINACH QUICHE
Printed from COOKS.COM
________________________________________
Vegetable cooking spray
2 c. sliced fresh mushrooms
1/2 c. diced onion
2 cloves garlic, minced
1/2 c. egg substitute
1 tbsp. Dijon mustard
1/4 tsp. salt
1/4 tsp. pepper
1 c. 1% low fat cottage cheese
1 (10 oz.) pkg. frozen spinach, thawed & drained
Vegetable oil pastry
1 1/2 oz. part skim Mozzarella cheese slices
Coat a large, non stick skillet with cooking spray; place over medium high heat until hot. Add mushrooms, onion and garlic; saute until tender.
Combine egg substitute and next 4 ingredients; stir in spinach. Add mushroom mixture, stirring well; spoon into prebaked pastry shell. Bake at 350 degrees for 35 minutes. Arrange cheese slices over quiche; bake 5 minutes or until cheese melts. Let stand 5 minutes before slicing.

Yield: 8 servings, 220 calories per serving.



VEGETABLE OIL PASTRY:
1 1/3 c. all purpose flour
1/4 tsp. salt
1 egg white, slightly beaten
1/3 c. vegetable oil
1 tbsp. cold water
Combine flour and salt; add egg white, oil and water. Stir with a fork until dry ingredients are moistened. Shape into a ball; place between 2 sheets of wax paper. Roll out to a 12" circle. Place in a 9" pie plate; flute edges. Prick bottom and sides of pastry with a fork. Bake at 450 degrees for 12 minutes. Yield: 1 pastry shell.


Today I am still in my PJs and I don't even care that a sweet neighbor came to visit me and she caught me resting in them. I have been doing a lot of that lately... a lot more than I really want to. This "recovery" stuff takes too long!!! I have been adding a few exercises each day to my routine and eating healthy and I decided about an hour ago that I wanted something chocolate. I have not had cravings of any kind since they installed my pacemaker and that seems like a good thing. I can't say I "crave" it. I just miss it because it is familiar to me. That is kind of the way it is with me and Julie and some of the other people who are part of her world. We are okay with change, as long as we can slip back into what is familiar to us once in a while like a trip to "In and Out Burger". If we did this all the time, it would not be healthy and we know that but if we just have an occasional trip into our "comfort zone" it makes it easier to deal with the "twilight zone" that we live in most of the time.

We all do things we really don't want to do and face the things that we wish we could escape. Julie is dealing with the struggle of knowing her grandfather was sick for a long time and his passing leaves her with a heavy heart. As she comforts her mom and her children, she has to try to find some "PJ" time for herself and that is not easy. We who know Julie are so thankful for the beauty that she brings to us with her care for others and the joy that her personality exudes. I wish I could just wrap her in a warm blanket and give her chocolate brownies to make her hurt go away but that is not going to happen. She has to go through this time herself and she has to help the others around her as they deal with their own pain. She will do great... it will take time but she will do great.

The reason I am sharing the Slimmed Down Spinach Quiche with you is Julie tries to eat gluten free and this is a gluten free recipe. I am also thinking if I make a healthy dish along with my gluten free brownies (from scratch with Ghiradelli cocoa) the healthy snack will cancel out the not so healthy one. What do you think?

Romans 10:15 how beautiful are the feet of those who preach the gospel of peace.

Love,
Nana

P.S. In case you wonder how I choose my verses, I say a prayer, open the Bible and type the words my eyes fall on so Julie, God must see how beautiful you are too. Loving you through this difficult time.

Looking from the inside out and Snow Ice Cream

This is for all my readers. Sometimes it's just hard.




Snow Ice Cream


Carefully remove the first layer of snow to remove any dirt from the air. Fill your bowl to the top with fluffy snow from drifts. My mom would not let us use the snow from the first snowfall and of course, always avoid yellow snow.

Add evaported milk or 2 percent if you are health consicious to make "slushy" then add sugar and tiny bit of vanilla flavoring.

Yummy!

Have you ever looked out a window at children playing in the snow? Have you ever looked into the nursery of a newborn baby and just stood there in wonder? You can sometimes hear the laughter of the children or see a hand or foot move on the baby and something inside you feels all warm at something you had nothing to do with. Have you ever looked into the eyes of a broken-hearted friend or the lost and lonely look of somebody you love and just wish you had the words or touch to make things better? If any of this has happened then you have a tiny glimpse of what it is like as God looks down on us.

When my son was in high school there were moments in his life that I just wanted to wrap him in a protective blanket and take him far away but that is not how life works. I did find a comic strip in the paper that he kept above his computer for a very long time. Haggar the Horrible was talking to his teenage son. He said "sometimes you are going to feel like the world world is out to get you". His son smiled at him and said "but it will just be my imagination, right dad?". The silence and sadness on his father's face said it all. Sometimes life is like that. You give everything you have but it is not enough. People around us see what is going on and they just can't make it better for us anymore than we are actual participants of what we see through the glass. Whether it's a good thing we want to treasure or a difficult time we wish we did not have to witness sometimes the glass between us separates us. Sometimes it is just hard.

John 6:41 They said "is this not Jesus, the son of Joseph, whose father and mother we know? How is it then that He says, 'I have come down from heaven'?"

If His own people did not believe Him, why would I expect anyone to believe me? Watching from a distance is very, very hard.

Love,
Nana

I was listening

Holding on to your hand and listening at the same time to your heart.
















Moms and dads are so excited when they hold their little ones for the first time and when they say their first words. That usually does not happen at the same time but for us it did. When Susan was placed in our arms she had just turned eight and she knew I was "Mama" and she melted her dad's heart when she looked at him and said "my Papa". Until that day, she had never seen us and the orphanage that was her home in Russia was filled with children hoping their parents would find them soon. A few days later, we brought her and her older brother Chris to their new home in Arizona. There were so many things they had not experienced before and I was listening to their chatter in Russian as we tried to get them accustomed to their new home. They were given American names because I had difficulty pronouncing Chris's Russian name. They were named with the help of their older brother, Scott, who was waiting for them at home. Christopher was chosen because it means "courage" and we knew it would take a lot of courage for this young man to trust us and accept us as his family. Susan has a beautiful Russian name of Alenia but she became Susan to honor me (my middle name is Sue), my mom (Susan is translated from the name Lilie which was my mom's name) and a dear friend whose name was Susan. Just as you would take thought of what to you choose to name a new-born, we took time in choosing their names with love. No, they did not grow in my body but they grew in my heart. I have so many stories in my heart about both of them but today is about Susan.

For Christmas, they both got bikes and Susan was so excited when she gained her balance and was able to ride without training wheels. We had a routine we did every day with some home schooling followed by outside play. Everything we did, I spoke to them in English of what it was along with sentences that matched the activity. We learned, "please open the door" and "please shut the door" as we went outside. The bikes were kept behind a locked gate. They would push the bike to the gate and I would open it from the other side. One day Susan said her first sentence without prompting! "Please open the gate". She understood! They were not just words to her. She understood what she was asking. My heart leaped inside my chest the way a mom does when she hears "mama" for the first time or sees her baby take their first step.

Last month, Susan came to me and said "Mom there is a Beth Moore study at church coming. Will you go with me?" I recently had surgery and was still in recovery but I agreed to do this for both our enjoyment. We are on our third week of class and each week we can hardly wait until the next week. This morning she was getting dressed to go to work. My baby girl recently turned twenty and is all grown up but I saw a different smile and peace on her face. I heard the unspoken words of my beautiful daughter "please open the gate of my heart". Thank you, Lord, for letting me be on the other side of the gate when she was ready to explore life with her bike to bring her safely across the walk. Thank you for that day. Now I see that she is the same little girl that I held for the first time so many years ago but she has grown into a young woman. Thank you for allowing me to serve you as her mom and letting me be on the same side of the gate with her as she explored You. When she was small, I listened for the words from her mouth and now I listen for the words from her heart. Every sleepless night, every tear I cried and every moment I doubted myself but went forward, this moment was worth it all. I am truly blessed.

Romans 8:37 "yet in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us".

Love,

Nana

Who knew? and Perfect pancakes

Today I will write a normal blog... well as much as normal can be for me. You do know that I am not your average "normal" person by now. Right?

Perfect Pancakes

Choose your perfect pancake mix and the follow the directions for mixing.

Put on hot griddle (you will know it is perfect because water will bead up when sprinkled on it), cook on one side, turn them over, cook on the other and serve hot.

Who knew?


Who knew just flipping a few pancakes could be exhausting? Who knew that life can throw something at you that just frustrates you so much that you just want to get through this hour of this day because you KNOW that every day life gets a little better for you? Who knew? I certainly did not.

A few weeks ago I went to the doctor for an annoying dry cough. I ended up in the hospital for two heart conditions with long names. The final consensus of the doctors was I needed a pacemaker. When I let a friend of mine know that this was going on her granddaughter wanted to know how this was possible. Didn't this only happen to old people? I love that little girl! She is so wise.

Everyday I get a little stronger and can do a few more things but even the simple thing of flipping pancakes ends up with me taking a rest. The pacemaker takes care of the heart slowing too much in the lower chambers and several medications are needed to keep the upper chambers from beating too fast. My doctor says agrees with me when I say even my heart will start an argument inside me. I don't like feeling this way. Part of me wants to go for a run and the other part says "are you kidding me?". For now that part is winning and I really REALLY don't like that but I am so grateful that I can go shopping with my daughter, play with my granddaughter and even flip pancakes. I just have to remember to space my fun out and do more of it in the afternoon than the morning. Guess I won that argument! Ha! I can't go for a run yet but I am not stopping.

Happy birthday to my son. Today he is twenty-six. He likes to say he is my "oldest, middle and only child" and his description is absolutely correct even though he has five siblings. This is proof that confusion has always been part of my life. How could my heart possibly act anything but confused?

I got a reminder from a friend today that God does things in His own time and sometimes that might take a while. I'm supposed to be more patient... I am trying to be. I'm a morning person and I love to hit the ground running. Normally, (if there is a normal anymore), I am up before everybody and love the fun of making breakfast for my family. Today is was only pancakes but it is good to be back in my kitchen. Thanks for stopping by.


Romans 8:25 we hope for what we do not see; we eagerly for it with perserverance.

Love,
Nana

Two years? Really?

Just a quick note to my readers and to remind myself that even though time seems to drag when things are hard, they move faster when we don't let the heavy stuff bog us down. Thank you for sharing this blog with me. It has been a journey of spiritual, emotional and physical healing and I am so thankful that technology makes is possible.

Continue to pray for me and each other. There is still much healing needed.

Isiah 66:13 as one whom his mother comforts, so will I comfort you.

Thank you Lord for comforting this Mom and Nana.

Love,
Nana

A thought for your pennies and Baked Noodle Ring

This blog is for Nancie and for somebody special that I don't have to mention because God knows who she is.












Baked Noodle Ring

4 cups boiling water
1 t salt
1 4 oz package dry noodles (any kind will work but I like the egg noodles)
3 eggs
1 cup ham pieces or a can of tuna (optional)
1/3 cup broken crackers or stale potato chips
2 and 1/2 T butter melted
1 and 1/4 cup grated cheese


Cook noodles in boiling water with salt until tender (about 10 minutes). Drain and rinse with cold water. Beat eggs in bowl. Add everything else. Pour into baking ring. Set the ring in a pan with water to cover about 2/3 of the ring depth. Bake at 350 degrees for 45 minutes or until light brown. Turn noodle onto serving tray or plate. Serve hot.


A Thought for Your Pennies

We have all heard the saying “a penny for your thoughts”. Sometimes we say this when we see someone in deep concentration and we wonder what they are thinking. I would like to share with you a thought for your pennies. When I was a little girl, I often walked with my dad and he seemed to be lucky to me because he usually found coins other people had lost. He would say “see a penny pick it up and all day long you’ll have good luck”. I asked him if that was really true and he said “sure it is. If you are lucky enough to find enough pennies they will make a dime and dimes make dollars” then he would laugh as we walked on. A penny by itself is not worth very much but enough of them combined can have a value that is acknowledged by the world.

All my life I watched for that opportunity to scoop up pennies or lost change because I knew about the value of being rescued. Jesus rescued me from being lost forever because I was a treasure to Him. For years I said my dad’s little saying then one day I heard a better one. Wayne Dyer was speaking to a group and he said he does the same thing when he is walking and people look at him strangely that a man who obviously does not need the loose change, would stoop to rescue a penny. He said that every time he rescues a penny he prays “thank you, Lord, for this symbol of your abundance”. That was a profound statement to me and I have been using it now for about ten years with great joy.

A few months ago my heart was very heavy as I prayed for somebody that I love very much and, like always, I was wondering when God was going to answer my prayer. I was walking across the parking lot into work and I spotted a penny. I picked it up and it was covered with scars. Some were old and some were fresh leaving the penny very shiny from the fresh markings. I looked at the date and it was the date of the person I was praying for. I returned to my car and took a moment to pray for them again and to thank God for the reminder that the world sees our outward appearance. It sees our scars and determines our value based on what they can see. I don’t know what put the scars on this little penny and I don’t know what caused all the scars we can’t see inside of people we love. I knew and know only the surface pain of the person I was and am praying for. I carried that penny in my pocket saying a prayer for the person born the same year it was made. One day I decided to send the penny to them but prayed about it first and felt like God said, “No, this is between you and Me”. That's when I knew that my prayers needed to continue and I did not need to share this with the person who this little penny reminded me of. I pray knowing that the most important person knows the scars of the person I love. God knows the full truth of the scars I can see as well as those I don’t know about. He knows every scar on my heart and the hearts of others. Theirs bring Him tears just as mine do but, like the little penny; they do not change our value; not on earth and not in heaven. We are treasures to Him just as we are; scars and all.


Luke 15:9-10 and when she found the coin she called her friends and neighbors together saying rejoice with me for I have found the coin that was lost. Likewise, I tell you there is joy in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner that repents.

Love,
Nana

Finding our way and old fashioned cornbread

This blog is dedicated to Renee and Katrina. As they experience life living separately, may they always know the storms will pass.


Old Fashioned Cornbread

3 Tablespoonfuls vegetable shortening or bacon drippings
2 cups self-rising cornmeal mix
1-2 Tablespoonfuls sugar (optional)
1 and 1/2 cups milk
1 egg

10 inch oven proof skillet or 8" or 9" square pan; Will also make 12 muffin

Heat oven to 425 degrees. Melt shortening or drippings in the pan in the oven; tilt to cover the bottom evenly. Mix all other ingredients in a bowl then pour into hot skillet or pan. Bake 20-25 minutes. Toothpick will be clean when inserted into the center when done.

Finding our way

The picture with this blog is a weather report that Hurricane Katia is gaining strength and heading toward land. The heavy winds and rain have potential to do a lot of damage to the coastal cities along Texas where she will first touch land. We are warned when some dangers are coming our way and we are given a chance to prepare. Some things we think we are prepared for but when the heavy rains come or the wind tosses about things that were solid, we seek to find the calm again. Most people who have never experienced such storms don't know that there is a short period when you are in the "eye of the storm" and things seem to be calm, but the storm is not done. It still has to run it's course.

Katrina is beginning her first year at college. Susan began her first last year and while no two families experience things the same, there are some things that, like all hurricanes, are predictable. You prepare for the time when you will wake up and the familiar face across the table is not there. You prepare yet when it happens, it feels much different than you expected. I remember the first time Susan got sick away from home. I was so tempted to drive the three hours to her but I knew we had made a "medicine chest" for her and she could take the cold medicine and manage her day without her mom. The problem was, could mom manage her day without being there to take care of her. The wind and rain from that storm was not so bad but when there was a storm of "who is my friend and how do I overcome being lonely" there was nothing in that chest to make that hurt better. How I longed to give her the right words and advice but I couldn't. She had to find her own path. When she came home for Christmas, it was as if she never left but then a short time later, she returned to her dorm and the struggles of being a college student. We passed through the eye of the storm only for it to continue until it ran it's course. It was funny that on the day she was to come home, it was raining but the rain stopped as soon as we were by her side, moving her back home.

Today we have so much to help us find our way. Many cars have GPS devices as do cell phones and most people have one in their car. It's supposed to make your travel less complicated but I have followed the direction of mine many times only to end up far away from my destination. It is a flawed instrument but most of the time, it does point you in the right direction. If you choose not to follow it, you usually end up resetting it and starting all over but there is a guidance system that is flawless. When we follow the directions of God, we will find that the path may be narrow with only a few people on the journey with us but it always brings us back to Him. We can feel lonely or lost but if we keep our eyes on the prize, life works out for us. We can play around with the initials GPS and come up with a cool slogan like God's Prize Suffices... okay so maybe that is not the coolest but like ASAP means "as soon as possible" when we change it to "always say a prayer" there is hope in the message instead of panic.

That's what it means to follow Christ. We have hope where others panic and we know that our path will lead us to success and our success will affect others. Whether we sink to the bottom or swim to the light depends largely on our choices. I am so thankful for God who sees the storms in our life and cares enough to reach down and draw us to Him.


Matthew 14:27 "Jesus spoke to them, saying "be of good cheer! It is I; do not be afraid".

Love,
Nana

Morning Glory Story and Refrigerator Rolls

I dedicate this to my children who waited patiently while the dough rose every Thanksgiving for these rolls. Sometimes it's very hard to be patient.


Refrigerator Rolls

Makes 24 rolls

1 c. milk
1 cake compressed yeast
1/4 to 1/2 c sugar
1 c. lukewarm water
1 egg
7 c. sifted flour
3 Tablespoons butter or margarine
1 teaspoonful salt

1. Scald the milk over hot water in top of double boiler; cool to lukewarm
2. Add yeast crumbled as you add; add sugar, water and egg to the milk; beat with a hand mixer until well blended
3. Add 3 1/2 cups of flour, butter/margarine and salt to the mixture; stir with wooden spoon until blended. Slowly add remaining flour stirring until blended.
4. Place dough into greased glass or metal bowl; grease the top of the dough; cover and store in the refrigerator until ready to bake.
5. Remove dough from bowl and shape into rolls; place in pan and brush with melted butter. Leave at room temperature until doubled in size.
6. Bake at 425 degrees for 15-20 minutes


Through the eyes of a child everything has a different perspective. Fences that are covered with weeds and filled with the fragrant scent of Honey Suckle are seen as weeds and a nuisance to adults but in the eyes of a child they are much more.

Fences give a child boundaries and a sense of protection with a special kind of beauty that does not need words. Such a fence surrounded the home we lived in when I was five. I started my day running out the kitchen door to say good morning to beautiful flowers that covered the fence. One morning I got up and there were no flowers and I was upset but my mother explained that the pink, purple and white flowers I loved were only open for a little while and I had to get up early to see them. That became our special time. All the other children slept while mom drank her coffee and laughed while I said good morning to my Morning Glories.

One morning I got up and the fence was covered with neatly trimmed sticks with only a few Honey Suckle blossoms showing through. I burst into tears and asked my mother how this could have happened while I was sleeping. She explained that the fence belonged to someone else and they trimmed back the branches. My heart was broken. “Mama did you see how beautiful the flowers were?” She said “they were beautiful to me because I saw them through your eyes. They will come back. You will see them again.” I laid my head in her apron covered lap and cried.

Later that day I saw the neighbor with his hedge sheers putting the finishing touches on his trimmed bushes. He said “now doesn’t that look better?” to my mom. She gave me a look that reminded me that I should keep my opinion to myself. I wanted to say “you are a Meanie!” (because that was about as awful as you can be in the eyes of a five year old) but then he said something that made me and my mom smile at each other. “No matter how much I try I can’t get rid of this stuff. In a few weeks it will be just like it was yesterday.”

In the eyes of the world we blend in like the plants that grew into the hedge of protection that I saw every morning. Some have beauty like the Morning Glory and only a few see that beauty. Some are strong like the Honey Suckle and seem to come back no matter how much life throws at them. They do not get the attention of roses or orchids but they are always there.

God sees the beauty in all of us and allows a few to see it through His eyes. I know as I wept for the flowers He was preparing me for the morning I would have to get up and my mom would be gone and the strength of my father would weaken. The pain comes when what we want to remain permanent, changes. That is not how God works. In the early morning of our life He allows us to see beauty that we might know the joy to share with others. As we love and are loved by others we are creating a beautiful hedge of flowers for Him to see and enjoy. When the time comes for some flowers to close up like the Morning Glory or be trimmed like the strong Honey Suckle, He stands beside us and comforts us by letting us know that one day everything will become new again with Him.

Galatians 5:9 "A little leaven leavens the whole lump. I have confidence in you through the Lord that you will continue in your faith". 16 "I say then: walk in the Spirit".


Love,
Nana

Old songs with new meanings.

One thing that I like about writing my blog is I can start something, write my thoughts and come back later to edit it. That's really cool for me right now because I don't always have time to write everything and if I don't spell something right, it's not like I'm speaking to somebody face to face. I can go back later and change the words. I sure wish I could do that in real time. I dedicate this blog to my husband David. If I left the living room and he was reading, when I come back he will still be there. There are some things you really don't want to change.

Song number 1: What's that Sound
"Somethings happening here and what it is ain't exactly fair..." If you know the rest of the words, this will mean something to you but if you don't well... then it may not. It's all good.


I have a shirt that my son gave me; it's one I specificially asked for because I saw a woman wearing a hat with this logo and I thought "that says it all". It is stained from wear and orange (which is a color I would never buy for myself). It has a stick figure on it that any kindergardener could copy but the words... "Life is Good" says it all; at least it does for me. In fact, I believe that to be the truest statement I have ever heard. It does not say "Life is Fair"... that could be taken two ways: life is just "so so", not really bad and not really good or "Life is Just" which I really don't think it is.

If life were "just" or "fair", when we have grandchildren we would have the energy we had when our children were young and our bodies would stay as strong as our will. Going to the gym would really produce the bodies the television commercials promise and if anybody had to step in front of a bus, it would be the person on the way to hurt an innocent child but that's not how life is.

I have a job some people envy. My office is in my home and a majority of my work I do on the phone. It's not that I don't have a boss... I have several and I have to report my work to them quite often. Even though my work seems easy to others and I am grateful that I can work from home I have deadlines. Yes, I can do a load of laundry, start dinner and get half a days' work done in my pajamas but at the end of the day, there is nobody to answer for my project but me and when I get tired, I still have to meet those deadlines. Recently I was late in a deadline because I just forgot to finish it! If you read my blog about why grandmothers are grandmothers and mommies are mommies, you can see the comical part of this time but it really is not funny at all. It's not funny and it's not fair.

I miss having a photograhic memory. I miss being the person you could ask "what happened" and not get a blank stare.... I miss being myself.

There was a time when everything in my life seemed orderly. If I wanted a cookbook, I knew exactly where it was and could probably tell you what page the recipe was on even if it had been ten years since I used it. When you opened to the recipe I could probably tell you word for word what it said. My top bookshelf had the classics on it with novels in a small section and history took up two shelves. I had a whole book shelf of nothing but reference books from astronomy to how to rebuild a carburetor. The last time we moved we had fourteen cases of just books because my husband and son also find them valuable. That's how we all learned... once upon a time. We either had somebody show us or we went to a book... now people use computers or don't bother to learn about ancient stuff because it is so much more interesting to beat a video game.

My life is not orderly. I don't dust every Monday or shop every Friday and fill my car up with gas then wash it. That used to be my routine but I seem to run out of time before I run out of "list". I don't mend the laundry as I find the missing button in the dryer or mend the tear on the pocket. That used to an easy way to take care of our laundry, you know the old "a stitch in time saves nine". (Do the repair before it becomes a major rip or you loose the button). You would think that gives me more time to do other things but it doesn't. For the first time in my life, I panic instead of welcome the thought of deadlines. It has always been a personal game with me... deadlines are just dates. I always strive to complete the task in an orderly way well before deadline and above what is expected. That's getting harder for me. It is almost spring and I have Christmas things still sitting on my desk. I am no longer orderly or efficient and I don't like it. Alas. That is how life is I suppose.

Song number 2: Jesus loves meAnytime I find myself concentrating on song number 1, I try to remember song number 2. Then I have to smile and say "He certainly does" and life does not have to be "fair" or "just"... just lived.

Ecclesiastes 3:1 "To everything there is a season and a time to every purpose under heaven" and His timing is always perfect without "deadlines".

Love,
Nana